On Course at the Mega Part One, 'Art Of Living' this weekend I was asked the question: "What do I take responsibility for?" and without much contemplation my instant response was: "Nothing". I was fascinated by all the different answers, but when my friend Sonia replied that she takes responsibility for everything I questioned myself and engaged myself in a deeper search for an answer.
As I questioned myself about what responsibility means to me it triggered the response: ACCOUNTABILITY which in turn triggered the emotional response of BLAME. I immediately saw through myself to my protective pattern to which I have clung through the years. I saw how I was terrified of owning a pet because I'd be committing to remain responsible for their welfare for a long time to come. I remember balking at the idea of marriage and children in my twenties because the thought of all that responsibility seemed too great to bear. I confronted myself on the issue of my husband's communication to me that he feels burdened with all the responsibility of our finances, discipline of our children, just everything and I started to observe that through my reluctance to commit to being responsible to anyone or for anything I had burdened him with a huge emotional load.
Delving into the possibility of stepping up to the proverbial plate and accepting responsibility for something I started with myself.
I immediately discovered that I feel fully responsible for my own thoughts, words and actions and in fact all of the choices that I make, whether they are the choice to create separation or to love. As I sat with this consciousness I explored the option of creating obstacles for others by the choice of my negative intentions and perhaps careless egotistical actions. Every thought, word or action that I initiate has a cause and effect knock on. I realise that my sending love into the world has a loving knock on effect and likewise my sending anger or egotistically charged emotions into the ethers has a negative effect.
However, how others react to the ripples I cause is something that everyone has to take responsibility for. Do we wish to perpetuate the cycle of negativity or do we negate it by propagating love. Do we become entangled in bitterness, unforgiveness and blame allowing our egos to lord it over our true selves or do we see through the dark actions of others as a cry for love and support?
The more I sit with the question, the more I observe how much influence I have in the thoughts and deeds I project. I realise too that we all need to encounter difficulty and trials so as to allow us the opportunity for growth and development. It is only when we have experienced suffering that we know how much better it feels to be free of suffering. But suffering is indeed an important asset in finding true happiness. These two opposites are vital for the existence of each other and they are complimentary.
To realise this is complete power. I realise my power in my freedom to choose. Do I choose to create division and misery and hardships for others? Do I want to be the cause of other's suffering and life lessons? Or do I want to be a gift of love, peace and happiness?
And in as much as I believe that we all need our share of suffering and sadness, I know that it is not my wish to be the creator of such. My wish is to be a messenger of love and for that I take 100% responsibility.
I pledge to constantly remain in a state of awareness, to catch myself when ego steps out of line which is a minute by minute challenge. I promise myself to think kindly of others, to give them the benefit of any doubt, to love unconditionally and to do unto others as I would pray others do to me.
If I can just be responsible for generating love consciousness and compassion in this world, then I have freedom from fear, hatred and all host of unloving emotions. When I am responsible for how I think, act or speak then I am accountable for how I influence others' lives and because I don't wish to walk around with guilt of adding to others burdens, it is my choice to be LOVE. I fully accept the responsibility.
And in accessing the love within me I realise that 'I' am nothing and 'LOVE' is everything. It is not mine to give. It is free to all of us who are receptive to it and I am just a channel through which LOVE flows.
I am responsible for allowing love to flow through me. And I am so blessed by this awakening.
May you be a divine channel of love this week as we prepare our hearts and minds for the season of giving. Let's be responsible for channelling love this Christmas. Let's see how much joy we can bring to others.
all of Love's richest blessings
Nicolette
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