Man Up or Be a Woman?

I spent my long weekend embracing my femininity, showering myself in wonderful quiet time alone, interspersed with an art movie or two, a powerful bliss dance session on Friday night and curled up in front of my fireplace with my new book, Kagiso Msimango's' The Goddess Bootcamp.

Kagiso's book is a journey into unravelling the essence of what makes a woman a Goddess rather than a doormat. Of course, we'd all rather be a Goddess or share the presence of a Goddess than a doormat wouldn't we?

It was when she mentioned the list of commonly used sayings, that I too have used on numerous occasions, that a light bulb went on inside my head.

These are things we say to one another in jest and complete innocence: "Man up!" "Stop being a girl!" "You son of a bitch!" "Grow some balls!"

However, if we look at the underlying meaning of those words, what are we saying? That to be a man is right and to be a woman is wrong? Aren't we implying that our masculine energy is preferable to our feminine energy. These sayings are nothing other than derogatory to the feminine. They imply that women are bitches, bimbos, sissies or whores.

We need to look closely at our inherited conditioning and weed out the legacies that don't serve us. If we continue to blurt out these kind of statements without considering the effect it has on all of those in our midst, including ourselves, we will continue to create a sexist, bullying, capitalist, dog-eat-dog kind of world.

I am not trying to take the fun out of life, I am merely pointing out the importance of bringing consciousness to our thoughts, intentions and words. You see, if we continue to use phrases like this we will continue to devalue the feminine and worship the masculine. We tell our sons to "Man up!" as if they need to be any more manly in this male-dominated world. What we actually need, and that is ALL of us, is a lot more softness, compassion and receptivity. But we continue to repeat these sayings even amongst women, to motivate ourselves to be strong, courageous, go-getter's who will stop at nothing to get out on top.

It has been 60 odd years since the radical women libbers burnt their bras in a public protest for equality between the sexes. Their cry to be heard just escalated women into their masculinity as they fought to make it and measure up to men.

My question is this. How long does it take for the conditioning of our pasts to be eradicated?

To change our world we need to nurture our feminine energy. We have spent centuries in our masculine and look where it has gotten us. War, hatred, crime, greed, masses of homeless, starving people. Our world is crying out for softness, empathy, love and nurturing.

Embrace your feminine, whether you're a man or woman. Cherish your femininity and discover your innate power. Don't lose or devalue your masculinity, rather curtail the man in you and invest time in coaxing your woman out of the shadows. For out of woman's womb came all of creation.

Have a blissful week ahead

love
Nicolette