Within

Within me I discern a small inner voice

It has been waiting patiently to connect with me …

Waiting silently for the noise to diminish,

Awaiting an audience with my harried soul

Waiting…..

Without agenda or need

Awaiting a miniscule gap in the incessant cacophony…

An opportune parting of the clouds in which to reveal itself,

Baited and ready with answers to the questions that I haven’t yet asked

A healing balm at the ready…

 

The small inner voice is calling my outer self

To come home and align itself in resonance…

To give it permission to sooth my weary soul

To fill me with a trove of ancient wisdom

And healing from the great heart

To quench my thirst and satiate my desiring

To connect with the Mother of all mothers

And receive a warm nurturing embrace…

A healing balm for my heart’s aching

A caring ear,

A soothing word of assurance

 

The message my inner voice wants me to know is…

That everything is as it is meant to be

That I am enough…

That I am intentioned,

That my timing is perfect,

That I am cared for by the unseen realm of Divinity

That I should savour every never-to-be-repeated moment

That there is no judgement

That I am infinite love

And that I am free.

Have an awesome week, beautiful soul!

Namaste

Nicolette

P.S. This week create a gap in your incessant rushing from one experience to the next, that you may experience the wisdom within you.

Be happy! I love you.

 

 

Messing Up

I have been doing a lot of pondering in the last couple of days, digging deep through my layers and uprooting some really uncomfortable issues that I wasn’t superficially aware of.

One issue that surfaced, challenged me to burn off some of the conditioned patterning from my upbringing. I had the opportunity to dance with a blindfold on, this weekend. The interesting thing that surfaced for me was homophobia. I felt rather hypocritical as I acknowledged and dragged up the undealt with pain of the deeply entrenched collective ego buried within me.

The blindfold liberated me from the confines of my mind. I found I was connecting with the soul of the person I was dancing with, rather than their outer attributes or packaging. I always thought that I was doing a great job of being equanimous, but my humanness surfaced and revealed deeper layers that still need refining. It was an enlightening and freeing experience, but at the same time I felt humbled and rather disappointed in myself.

Some other incidences of late have mirrored for me just how impulsive, tactless and opinionated I am prone to be. I sometimes exhaust myself trying to reconcile the irreconcilable and fix the unfixable, instead of accepting everything just as it is. Again I was made aware that my opinions are just opinions based upon my individual experiences and that my truth is exactly that, just ‘MY truth’, no one else’s.

I may sound rather negative today, as I haul myself over the coals and address the negative aspects of myself. However uncomfortable it has made me feel, it serves to remind me that I am human and flawed and need to forgive myself wholeheartedly.

Today, I give myself permission to have the experience of unconditional love through experiencing everything that it is not, to act unconsciously, to make choices I will later regret and to dive into each experience with the fearless abandon of a child.

I know as a result, I will frequently get messy, but three quarters of the experience is in the cleaning up.

I believe in second chances. So, when I stumble and fall, I will forgivingly dust myself off and try again.  

So, dear soul, give yourself the grace to be kind to yourself when you mess up, and have a beautiful week!

Love
Nicolette  

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The Sun has Set

Witnessing the breakup of my friends’ marriages has always grieved me deeply. I always felt the loss was far further reaching than the immediate family unit. As each partnership broke up I would feel shattered and torn in my loyalties to the couple, their children, their extended family and the community. I always felt gutted. Each divorce was rather like a death for me. I guess it is a death of the old way and a birth of a whole new paradigm. It’s funny how we cling to familiarity and wanting to keep things the same. I selfishly wished my friends could have found a way to make it work and stay together.

I have always been one who fights and perseveres until I triumph, so committed to my vision and intended outcome. I don’t believe in quitting. I don’t believe in failure. I also don’t believe in relationships being romantic and perfect. I believe relationships are our mirrors testing and challenging us to face our weaknesses and to grow up.

I internalised each divorce and wrestled with questions about whether it is better to sacrifice your own happiness for the sake of your children and the community. I enquired of myself whether the lessons you come together to learn in partnership ever come to an end. I had this nagging notion that divorce is quitting or giving up. I observed the gridlock situation where the two parties no longer chose to co-create and journey side-by-side. I accepted that the subsequent divergence of the two as entirely separate entities was inevitable.

My friends’ divorces challenged me to make the choice to remain equanimous, neither favouring one spouse nor the other. I have always advocated that there are many sides to each separation and that until you have walked each of the warring party’s paths you cannot judge. I always thought I was scrupulously unbiased and non-judgemental in choosing sides, however I am human and obviously did hold an opinion, which I tried to keep under wraps. I tried my best to show my love and support to both parties, even if I didn’t understand the reasons for the breakup.  

So, it is with absolute humility, that I now find myself in the situation I have witnessed from the side lines many times before. I am separating from the man to whom I have been married for over a quarter of a century.

It is a sensitive place of adjustment for myself and for everyone around me. I am acutely aware of the division amongst friends as they wrestle with their own fears and opinions. I feel the victimisation of those who have chosen to blame me for the breakup. I feel sad for the loss of the family unit for my two grown up sons. I feel for our friends and extended family, but I know that I have to be true to myself and my life purpose. I realise that my journey with my former life partner has come to a fork in the road and there is no way of continuing our journey together. One of us would have to sacrifice ourselves to walk the other’s walk and that is just incomprehensible.

As the sun sets on my marriage of 26 and a half years I wish to acknowledge all the good times we shared and pause in gratitude for the lessons that our relationship taught me. I emerge from the separation - stronger, wiser and assured that my choices today are informing my future.

I wish to leave you with this thought -  “In every beginning there is an inherent ending.”

May you be well!

Love

Nicolette

LOVE LIFE

                                                  

Today, let’s take a page out of Rumi’s notebook and define what we love in order to define what and who we are and take ownership of the lives we have created…

I love nature and long walks on the beach. I feel close to my Creator.

I love sunrises and sunsets. They remind me that God is a forgiving God.

I love ALL people. It awakens the knowing in me that my family is Universal.

I love trees. They are so grounded and they symbolise quiet inner strength and control.

I love animals. They teach me unconditional love.

I love ice cream. I always feel young, innocent and childlike when I eat it.

I love kisses and hugs. They make me feel warm and connected.

I love my five senses. They fill me with gratitude for the euphoric experiences they afford me.

I love my inspirational writing and speaking. They infuse me with positive energy and make me happy.

I love the law of giving and receiving. It validates me knowing that we all have valuable gifts for one another.

I love surprises. They give me hope for the future and keep me detached from the past.

I love learning from wise masters. It expands my consciousness.

I love diving into life, getting messy and learning from my mistakes. It reminds me that I am human and am worthy of self-forgiveness.

I love risk. It makes me feel alive.

I love diversity. It keeps me young, intrigued and fascinated by life.

I love the sun. It reminds me of who I am which is love and is everlasting.

I am passionate about life. It is such an experiential adventure.

What do you love? I’d love for you to write and tell me. 

Have an awesome week!

Love

Nicolette